Thursday, May 07, 2009

Answers, for My Sake More than Yours, I Think...

I.
Are you angry because the author [David Kessler] glosses over the reasons people overeat, or because he doesn't offer much in the way of solutions?

Good reading, Susan. I was really furious and perhaps wasn't clear about this.

He all but calls sugar and fat addictive substances but stops at approaching them the way most clinicians would approach alcoholism. He stops short despite having spoken of people who feel out of control or obsessed by food, and writing widely about how sugar and fat stimulate the reward/pleasure/addiction/fear/pain regulator in the brain.

The reasons people overeat are as many as there are minutes in overeaters' lives. Tonight I would go out for Little Debbies because I was lethargic and tired today and didn't do any writing. (This post is supposed to save my ass.) Tomorrow morning I might go out for pancakes because I'm really tired of walking dogs and, hey, I need a little motivation.

In a way, I don't think the reasons people overeat matter. Everybody has to sort that out for themselves. But finding the reasons is not a eureka! moment. If I zone out on donuts in a land where no one can hurt me, all the reasons in the world aren't going to overcome that reward groove I've got going in my brain.

What I'm angry about is that he successfully describes sugar, fat and salt as an addiction but deliberately doesn't use the word or the techniques of the addiction model. He could have at least investigated it.

There was a lot of fascinating material in the book but I don't think anyone is going to lose weight because they read it. I do not feel that way about other books. People lose weight because of reading Atkins or Geneen Roth because they either give an inspiration of how to do it or why to do it.

II.
The God Thing

I'm a doubter by nature, although when I walk into a Catholic Church I immediately believe the wildest fairy tales. When I did my Third Step this time, I decided I would create a god who is at my beck and call. I won't ask him for anything. I demand it.

There is a dusk bird singing loudly in the gardens beyond my window. Daisy has loved me through the emotionally toughest years of my life. I will have very cold stewed apples for dinner. That's my personal, capsule-sized proof that God exists.

I want to yack every time I hear someone say "Goddess, grant me the serenity..." or refers to HP for "higher power". But there are some tangible things that are bigger than me, one of them being my desire to eat sugar, fat and salt. Electricity, my favorite thing (where would ice cream be without it?) is bigger than me. The Rooms and their success stories and support are bigger than me. Inspiration is bigger than me. My sponsor's 20 years of abstinence and affection for me is bigger than me.

So personally I don't have a problem thinking that there are powers beyond my own. And I don't have a problem squooshing them together and inventing a god that suits me.

Some Rooms are really, really Jesus-obsessed. I've been warned that the South is not a good place to go into recovery if you kind of think Jesus was prissy. Some are so new age that my blood sugar rises at the thought of them. Some have a good balance where the god thing isn't too heavy.

But I definitely get it that the God Thing can get in the way. I happen to take it for real, but not very seriously and not very zealously.

If it's what's stopping you from dropping into the Rooms, you can write sarcastic emails to me.

III.
Eaties and Foodies


Everybody seems to see themself in that post. There are moments that I'm a foodie, but when I am, I often want more.

Right now I'm ruminating on how abstinence makes me a foodie more often than I am when I'm not abstinent. I love what I'm eating when I'm abstinent, partly because I'm actually hungry and food is gratifying under that condition.

Goodnight, all. Dream of good things tonight!


11 comments:

Susan said...

What I'm angry about is that he successfully describes sugar, fat and salt as an addiction but deliberately doesn't use the word or the techniques of the addiction model. He could have at least investigated it.Gotcha. I take your point that David Kessler could/should have provided some guidance, particularly since his book is called "The *End* of Overeating" - not "The Beginning of Overeating"!

Unknown said...

I am tip-toeing toward trying an OA meeting. There is one at the university where I work... at the women's center. I figure that would be a more liberal-minded environment than some of the "Rooms" you described, Frances.

Thank you for continuing to pursue this and put it here for us to consider. I *know* there is some unified theory of obesity!

As far as emotional eating: Yes, I do that. But I also eat because it simply feels good. Releases endorphins? Who knows. I like the way things taste and I like to fill myself with them. I feel sad when I contemplate abstinence. Last night I was whining about my weight loss avoidance and heard myself say (to my daughter, good god!) "Just shoot me." That's what I'd call an addiction.

Quilting Martha said...

I heard this guy on the radio the other day on NPR. Maybe the reason why he didn't put much in the book about losing weight is that his solution is nothing new. He says people who successfully lose weight are those who say to sugar, fat and salt "I don't eat that."

drlisa said...

Great blog Frances! When I was writing my dissertation two parts of my work was questioned: Spirituality and Food Addiction. This put me in a quandary because the title of my work: Spiritual Recovery from Food Addiction, initially blocked me from progressing and presenting the "meat" of my work. The addiction model is the model I work from treating eating disorders and often there is a conflict with other arenas working solely off the medical model. As for David Kessler, I wonder if he avoided using the word addiction or better yet, food addiction, for fear of being stopped at the gate preventing him from launching his work. Or...he does not believe what he wrote and refused to "name" it food addiction.

Susan said...

As for David Kessler, I wonder if he avoided using the word addiction or better yet, food addiction, for fear of being stopped at the gate preventing him from launching his work. Or...he does not believe what he wrote and refused to "name" it food addiction.Interesting... when I read Frances' response to my original question, I wondered whether David Kessler didn't use the word "addiction" for commercial reasons. You can't simultaneously write about "food addiction" *and* tout your book as an "easy" weight loss solution.

drlisa said...

Excellent point Susan!

Blue_Eyes_Dreaming said...

I totally agree with you - I am much more of a Foodie when I am abstinent - much more of an Eatie when I'm not!

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